There are lots of different words for it: kissing, smooching, snogging, necking, making out, sucking face, the tongue-tango, tonsil hockey, but whatever you call it, nothing beats a nice session of osculation. In a place like Bangkok, where kissing strangers in clubs is just another night of partying, some people tend to overlook the importance of a good kiss. Style, compatibility, technique, flavour, aroma, and whether your partner needs a shave or not (man or woman) all comes into play to determine if a kiss is just a kiss or a tantalizing little bit of mutual face-sex. Nothing beats a great kiss, other than a great kiss followed by an hour or two of naked down-and-dirty.
Scientists (you know the ones, the nerds who’ve never been kissed before) tell us that the kiss developed from our ape ancestors’ need to sniff each other’s facial oil glands; It gives you an idea of what you are getting involved with, like sticking your nose into an old carton of milk… you soon know if it is a bit off. Same with a kiss, the egg-heads will say: by sniffing each other you can tell if the girl you are getting into the sack with has been sitting on the shelf a little too long. Of course I am not sure I agree with the nerdo-squad on this one, but I will admit, I am a sucker for a sexy facial oil gland. But then again, who isn’t? How many times have you said to your buddy, “Hey, check out the oil glands on that one!”
And speaking of sniffing, Thais actually like to sniff each other. It’s a kind of a Thai kiss. Rather than making that little sucking noise with your lips as you press your cheeks against each other (think of two Frenchmen meeting each other on the street), Thais like to make a quick, sharp sniffing noise through their noses. They will press their nose against your face and take a quick sniff…. Or maybe they just do that to me. Perhaps it’s time to change my soap. It’s one of the few times I prefer the way the French do things to the way the Thais do.
To tongue or not to tongue?
A good snog-sitting isn’t always easy to find. Obviously there needs to be a great deal of compatibility in technique. First and foremost there needs to be a compromise on how far open the mouth needs to be. There are those who are pretty tight-lipped, not wanting to risk opening the lips at all lets an uninvited tongue makes a housecall, while on the other end of the spectrum there are those who seem intent on eating your face whole. I once had to open my eyes just to be certain the girl I thought I was kissing hadn’t swapped out with a camel while I wasn’t looking. My face was wet from the bridge of my nose to the bottom of my chin. Of course we kept going, but it was a soggy mess.
And then there is the age old question: To tongue or not to tongue.
The answer is yes, tongue. Always…
By Magnum Reynolds